NSP.  President George W. Bush, one of our newest acolytes, in cooperation with the new church committee formed by Bishop Nancy Pelosi are working on new ways to combat the warming of our Great God/ess Mother Earth.  Since it is a known fact that the cow population in the world produce more methane emissions resulting in more CO2 than all of the cars in the world combined, approximately $1 Billion has been appropriated to research to combat cow flatulence.

Green Technologies, a subsidiary of Soros Industries,  received a grant of approximately $33 million for a feasibility study for attachable smog pumps.  These smog pumps would be attached to the cows’ rear end, and include their own catalytic converter.  Proposed legislation that would go along with this would be annual cow emission inspections.

Vegan Biotech, received a grant for $55 million to gengineer grass–biotechnically altering the genetic structure of grass.  Initial tests have been inconclusive, but the Bishop Pelosi has already given the go ahead to raize the entire grazing lands world wide and replace it with “Less-Gas Grass” (patent pending).

Other monies have been allocated to Beano to develop Cow-Beano, complete with legislation requiring random blood tests for bovines and a new agency to head this initiative.


Published in: on January 19, 2007 at 11:55 pm  Leave a Comment  

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